Hurt Boys

Oh how those hurt boys feel so good

Strong men with little boy hearts

Hurt so good

Yummy

Sweet

Make me cry

Make me die

In the bedroom

I always appreciate

A little tragedy in my man


I’m sorry.


I just need to write a rage, a page in my notebook

about 2 hurt boys who hurt bad and tried to love one another

about 2 puzzle pieces that couldn’t quite fit in the groove of each others twisted worlds


when feelings are involved all things are clouded

jaded, faded

pain swells up on puffs of smoke from your bad habits

and I broke because you broke and we broke the hope to hope

I’m sorry that I have to hate you

but I need to do it right now

get real mad so I can get past the sad and bate you

to have a response because I’m still hurt

I realize now that I confused warning signs for butterflies

and I need to cut the cord

but how to recover from the lies

magic spells, 3 times clockwise I yell

“I release you from me. I release me from you.” Let me go. I let you go.

I’m just trying to live my life.

I think

“I wish it never would have happened.”

But I rescind and begin again

because of the gifts I’ve received from the hurt.


I have moments-

Is this how we age, having moment after moment?

heartache, realization, a war to wage?

Do feelings get stronger?

Does this past go away…?

No, not go away,

but lessen?

become more bearable

Hark: “I am ready”

I say

And I get the scissors and cut free the links that bind us.

I feel relieved.

Empowered.

I’m finally good

I think, and I am for a while

But then the liquid runs shallow in my half full cup.

The sadness grows

the lows reel me back in

make me think of you:

bipolar, cute, sad man-boy, uncaring for fashion and clothes,

gap-toothed, baby- faced demon

holding my heart like a pacifier

Do you know what you do to me?


Oh how those hurt boys hurt so sad

Strong men with little boy hearts

Hurt real bad

Slumming

Stunning

Me like prey

Have their way

In the bedroom

I always lose myself

In the tragedy that is a man



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